Well, things are slowly getting better. I am still on a mostly liquid diet as I find that I am having a few issues. One being my system rejecting food and the other that my stomach is not only physically smaller due to the fundoplication but also smaller from lack of real food since the 23rd of October.
It didn't seem to matter too much as I really didn't have much of an appetite but now I find I am feeling hunger just that about 1 cup of anything liquid or mushy fills me up. As a result of this I am down 9 lbs since the day of the operation (Oct 24). Fortunately I had put a bit of weight on over the summer so had a bit of leeway but I am feeling fairly weakened of course.
I visited the surgeon this past Tuesday for followup and he expressed concern for my weight and inability to retain sustenance. He said to followup with him in a week if it hadn't changed or improved and then another followup in a month's time. He removed the steristrips (I thought there were stitches under - there were but dissolving) and all but 2 are healed over. The other 2 still have some scabbing and were the biggest of the incisions. I also found that I had a few issues taking regular tylenol even though it was in an easy to swallow format for me the round pills stuck for a bit. He said to try smaller or cutting them and to let him know if that continued. Obviously there is some swelling from the surgery so fingers crossed that is all there is.
Interior I can feel discomfort and sometimes there is still pain. I have to admit when the pill stuck I freaked out a bit and worried that I would have to go to the ER but after about 15 mins it slipped the rest of the way down - phew. I also find that I still tire very easily - almost too easily - when I try to increase my activity level. 2 hours at the shop and I'm wiped out. So baby steps where that is concerned. I will increase my daily activity level til hopefully it returns to somewhat normal.
So what are my feelings overall?
At this point I am still on the fence as to having had this surgery. Yes in the long run I will be able to eat fairly normally with some things I may have to avoid or moderate - hopefully. But that first 10 days I had serious regrets. Not just the pain which was pretty intense but also the thought that I had still 5 or so weeks of recovery. That I had done something to my body that changed my anatomy and how is that going to affect me down the road. That I truly hadn't realized just how long and difficult the recovery would be. That almost 3 weeks later I would still be feeling not myself. That I could seriously get sick of broth and jello and want to start eating but also afraid to because of the risks. Slow and steady, stick to the Nissen Diet (for this type of surgery).
I have read many blogs and forums where the outcome is all over the map from some having no issues at all and are fully back to normal and others that have residual affects including still some form of restriction in their esophagus. I am hoping that I will be in the first group.
I am getting a bit stir crazy too. I have watched enough Netflix (Rupauls Drag Race for one) and the Heart & Home station has given me some easy watching movies that don't need too much thinking but are still enjoyable. I think I've also read about 6 books. I'm tired also of sleeping in a semi-upright position. My neck, upper back and tail bone are feeling the consequence of that. I tried sleeping flatter but the discomfort in my lower chest was unbearable. I also find sleeping on my left side feels like my right side incision is pulling so I can't do that. So I spend alot of time more or less prone but upright at the same time. Again hopefully that will eventually change over the next little while.
It's also difficult letting go of the normal things that I can't do at this time. Like lifting a bag of groceries or a basket of laundry. Running the vaccuum. Cleaning up the backyard. Raking or sweeping the leaves. Stuff that needs doing but I just cannot do it! Frustrating. Yes it's only been 2.5 weeks and it was major surgery but if you know me you know that I am not someone who likes just laying around day after day without doing SOMETHING productive.
Thank goodness I have amazing clientele and they are super supportive and patient at this time. I wish I had been able to do this a few weeks earlier and be farther on the road to recovery but at least it has been done before my crunch time and I can be there when I need to be.
Insofar as eating, I have 2 different kinds of supplements (Boost Juice & Ensure), various creamed or pureed soups, apple sauce, yogurt and cream of wheat. Ice cream and popsicles help fill the void of snacks. So for the most part still pretty liquid. The doctor suggested I try adding a few things from the mushy part of the diet (a 4 week program) so Drew made some swedish meatballs (amazing recipe with ground turkey one of our favourites) and I enjoyed a cup of mushy noodles with sauce (no meat). It was divine! Had that for 2 nights and tonight I'm trying some good ol macaroni and cheese made in the crockpot and hopefully the noodles will be super soft and easily swallowed.
Hard to believe that these simple things bring so much anticipation.
I am still overwhelmed by the amount of friends who make a point of touching base with me and checking on my progress. Their support, love and prayers are so appreciated and I realize that I have so many people in my life who I love and who are there for me. <3 Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
I'll try to touch base with you all next week.
Love ya,
Deb
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