HEY!! Yes Its Been almost a Year since you heard from Me.

This blog post is going to go back to its original intent in regards to my health.  Since 2014 when I started my health journey things have changed a bit with me.  Due to arthritic issues with my hip for instance, I find I am not able to run or walk up and down 175 stairs x 10.  That has been difficult for me as not only did I feel so good (and strong) after, it was a huge piece of social interaction for me. I do miss it but realize that this is just not the point in my life where it needs to be important.
We have also had a wedding (April 2017) and a new grandson (May 2018).  Along with my other 4 grandchildren I try to spend as much time as I can with them.  I am still able to play and keep up with them for the most part so I am happy for that.  I was very fortunate to spend almost 4 months up at our cottage where I kept myself busy with some jobs that needed doing.  My motto has always been, get up, have coffee/breakfast and catch up with social media/news and then spend a good amount of time on my chore of the day.  After a late lunch I take the time to chill down on the dock if possible and that is my reward and justification.
So life is going along pretty smoothly.  I'm keeping my weight down - up and down 5 - 7 lbs or so but for the most part still manageable.
Then something weird happened.
I noticed that I was having some issues swallowing.  First it was food.  I assumed it was due to the fact that maybe I wasn't chewing properly or eating too fast.  Food was sticking deep down in my throat.  Not where I could easily dislodge it either.
Then after a period of time I noticed that water or coffee was not going down correctly.  It would sit.  Right there.  At the point right between my breasts.
Then another thing started happening.  Not only was it not going down, it was starting to come back up.  Spontaneously.  A simple cough and undigested food or liquids would be forcibly ejected from my throat.
What the hell was going on????
My first thought was a hiatal hernia.  Thinking that my maternal grandmother had told me on the occasion of my oldest daughter's christening that she suffered from one.  I thought ok that must be it.  At this time we were also between GP's so I made a decision to visit a local walk in clinic.
How lucky that I chose that day.  The Dr. who saw me took my symptoms seriously and prescribed a proton block inhibitor for the acid reflux I seemed to also be suffering a severe case of and booked a barium swallow test to see what was happening.
After suffering through a test to swallow what my body was not wanting to swallow I went back to the Dr. to follow up.
At this point I had started to lose weight at an alarming rate - 5lbs/week. And I was not only starving, I was becoming malnourished and dehydrated.  It was a 5 hr chore to ingest an 8 oz smoothie every day.
He advised me to run to the ER and get myself hydrated (via IV).  After an 8 hr stint in the ER, even though I had a pic line in, an IV was never actually started and the dr on call sent me home with the advise to sip water.  To say I was upset was an understatement.  I felt very unwell from lack of nourishment or liquids.  However, what it did do was get me onto a fast track to have an emergency endoscopy at a private clinic affiliated with the hospital.
At the same time that was booked, an opening finally came through for me to see a GI specialist in the area with a projected appointment for MAY!  This was already the beginning of February and it had been over 2 weeks since I went to the clinic the first time.  I cried a bit on the phone and the secretary promised to get me an earlier appt on a cancellation basis.  She advised me to still go to the endoscopy appointment and then we would have more information.
This was the first of many endoscopies for me.
The Dr. at the private clinic took me into a private booth after the procedure. I was just a bit terrified with what he was going to say.  First off - its NOT cancer. He fully expected that he was going to find cancer and was happy to tell me that it was not.  However, it is Dysphagia (https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/dysphagia/symptoms-causes/syc-20372028) complicated by Achalasia (https://www.healthline.com/health/achalasia).  So in a nut shell - my esophagus no longer works the way it is supposed to and at the base of the esophagus is a sphincter muscle that allows food to pass into the stomach while also preventing acid from backing up into the throat, that is also not working properly.  The lack of "motility" of the throat and the inability to allow food to pass makes for a quite rare condition.  It may be genetic (Nan's may have actually been that). It may be an autoimmune response, it may be nerve damage, it may be all 3.  Nobody knows for sure. So once I was finally able to get in and see the GI Dr (on a cancellation) just a week later, he immediately booked me into the hospital to begin a treatment.  At this point I had lost 15 lbs in just over 3 weeks.
This treatment uses Botox to freeze the muscle (sphincter). After dilating the opening, Botox is injected to freeze it in an open position.  This usually last 4 to 6 months.  Lucky me, I was having symptoms again after 2 months.  So over the next 16 months I had 6 or 7 more Botox injections and 2 more dilations.  All of these are done under sedation at the hospital via an endoscope.  I lose at least 1 full and sometimes up to 3 days depending on how I react to the particular sedation dosage they give me at that time. I was referred to a Thoracic surgeon to do something more permanently.  Basically a myotemy (slicing open the muscle) would have to be performed to allow me to eat more or less normally.
In the meantime over that 16 months I went to my daughter's wedding in Mexico - I was at the tail end of a Botox treatment so was having issues on and off through our trip with a horrible incident occuring on the plane on our return. I started to not want to eat out or with other people.  I had to eat very slowly and sometimes it would take 2 hours to eat a somewhat normal meal.  In November I had 1 bite of a delicious steak my husband prepared for me at the cottage and then spent the next 5 hours unable to swallow that solitary piece and having effectively blocked my throat I was also unable to swallow my own spit.  Every 15 mins or so I would have to rush to the washroom and well you can guess.  I woke up 2 times in the middle of the night on other occasions choking on my own spit.  I was afraid to sleep alone and if I did I slept in an almost upright position which played havoc with my back and hip.  The thoracic surgeon office would not give me an appointment until I had a Motility study done.  So off to yet another hospital to have a tube threaded down my nose to my stomach and then while carefully trying to swallow a liquid the tube would be pulled back up and readings would be digitally analysed.  Finally I did get an appointment with the thoracic surgeon.  Drew went along with me and we decided that surgery was the real only option for me at this point.  But the wheels of our Health Care - while awesome and fully covered - move very slowly.   The thoracic surgeon (Dr. M) wanted to perform his own exploratory endoscope!  So in the meantime I was subjected again to another Botox treatment.  In June I had my exploratory by Dr. M and my followup was finally booked for September. I decided I would suffer it out and not subject myself to another botox unless I had no choice.  I saw Dr. M. at the appointed time Sept 22.  We talked about the findings of his exploratory ( along with a weird infection for some reason that is not being treated) and he asked me to make an appt with the GI Dr. to discuss my options once again and that he felt that an operation would be the most obvious thing for me.  It seems that every botox and dilation I have on my esophagus is causing scarring.  Scarring means fibrous tissue which also means more difficulty with the surgery itself.  Great.  So NO more botox for sure til I can get in for surgery.  I made an appt with the GI Dr (Dr. C) and of course that was booked for Oct 9.  Once I saw him he was surprised to see that he had not in fact heard from Dr. M and had no idea what the plan was.  We discussed again the surgery and the botox and the outcome was that he would do his best to get in contact with Dr M, see what his thoughts were and push for the operation.  One week later, Oct 16, I heard back from Dr. C's office and she said that she had finally spoken with Dr. M's secretary and that my case was hitting urgent status and that they were on the fence about another botox as I was having severe issues again.  Surprisingly this time Dr. M's office said - tell her to come in tomorrow (Thurs Oct 18) at noon and we have an opening next week.
This time things moved quick.  Dr. M saw me, went over the operation again, I had spent some time researching so asked a few questions, and then just like that the surgery was booked.  For Oct 24 - day after tomorrow.  Surgery will be what is called a Heller Myotemy followed by a partial (180 degree) fundoplication where my stomach is cut and reattached farther up the esophagus wrapping around the just made incision/opening.  This second procedure is to help prevent a lifetime of GERD or acid reflux which carries its own set of long time problems.  I will also have a lifetime of screening for esophageal cancer.  It is the second procedure that entails longer recuperation and diet to follow after surgery.
I had my preoperative clinic today.  I saw a pharmacist, a phlebotomist (blood drawn), had an EKG, blood pressure checked, met with the anesthesiologist who went over her part of the operation and what it would entail (3 hours - General anesthetic) and then met with a nurse who went over what to expect after the operation and to provide me with any answers to questions I still had as well as take my blood pressure ( a bit elevated no kidding).  She reiterated that it was a 3 hr operation, I will most likely be there overnight, I have to remove my nails (confirmed by anesthesiologist) and no makeup or jewelry.
I am now officially nervous.
One of the questions on the forms I had to fill out this morning included: Do you have - a living will, a power of attorney over health, over finances, organ donation.  Makes you stop and think.  I know with any operation there is always a risk.  Small but there nonetheless.  I am not a young woman.  I have had people with losses of loved ones in our age group.  I think I need to address my wishes.  I feel morbid thinking about it.  I have so much living left to do.  I have 4 beautiful children and 5 amazing grandchildren.  I have a man I love deeply. My parents are still living.  I have much to live for.  Positive thinking is 90% of success in anything including health. But it still made me stop and think.
And so I spoke with a good friend who is a lawyer and she suggested I make a will making my wishes known and that even in this day a handwritten will is legal.  With my signature.
I don't have much in the way of earthly goods that are valuable but what I do have I don't want anyone quibbling over.
I have written things down.
I am prepared.
I removed my nails...20+ years since I have started wearing artificial nails.
I will place my rings etc. in a safe place.
I will tell everyone that I love them.  That they make my life happy and worthwhile and I wouldn't trade one minute.
I kissed my grandson (4.5 months) today and told him how much Gammy loves him. 
I hope I will be following up this blog post with one telling you how sore I am.  Complaining about the liquid diet I will have to follow for 1 week.  Followed by 4 - 6 weeks of more liquids and mooshy food.
Stay tuned.
Thanks for listening.
Debbie

Hello!! You Haven't Heard from Me in Awhile

Invictus Games

I’ve been asked to try and put into words what brought me to volunteer for Invictus and what I felt about the games.  I have struggled so hard to put my feelings down onto paper.  It is not easy to sum up.  This is not my first games.  I volunteered for PanAm and my role was getting the flags ready for the medal ceremonies at the Innisfil Shooting venue.  I was so overwhelmed with both the scope and the feel good camaraderie of the PanAm games.  I felt at the time it was the most life changing thing I had done.

The next year, following on the high of PanAm, I had the opportunity to volunteer for the Guelph Special Olympic Spring Games.  While only taking place over a 3 day weekend it was again an overwhelming feel good experience.  I loved every minute of it.  Every hug, every victory by each of the athletes, every medal (as once again I was involved with the medal ceremonies).  It too was a life changing experience.

Then in May of 2016 I received a message from a friend I made at PanAm.  She mentioned that Invictus was looking for volunteers for a 1 day gig.  I thought oh, ok… I don’t know what Invictus is (at that point) but she’s asking so I said yes.  I was asked to attend a meeting along with about 15 other people – some of them also from PanAm.  What I didn’t expect is that I would be caught up in not just the excitement of the day (and the possibility of seeing Prince Henry even from a block away) but that I would have an opportunity to not only learn what these games were about, but to learn something about myself.

That very first day I met a military member and his wife who I was asked to drive to all the media events of the day.  I was told he utilized a wheelchair and that he wore 2 leg prosthetics.  However, when he climbed into the Jaguar I was driving (nervously), I noted that he was in fact not wearing his prosthetics. He took a good look around the roomy back area and said to me, completely deadpan – wow look at all the legroom back here.  Well I cracked up and came back with oh great – I get a sitdown comedian!  He laughed and we made a connection.  He then told me about how he used humour to help deal with his PTSI.  I was so intrigued by not just him but by the fact that someone who has been through something none of the rest of us ordinary Canadians can possibly imagine could still, make a joke with a total stranger.  He touched my heart.

At the end of the Launch day I was asked if I would be interested in volunteering for the games.  I said sure – I would go online and make an application.  I was then informed that if I wanted they would find me a position as they liked my ability to just jump in and do whatever I was asked to do.  I at first felt no – I will do what everyone else does and apply through the normal channels cause that would be fair and also I wanted to once again maybe be involved with the Medals as that is what I knew.  However, after thinking about it I thought perhaps I really wanted to do this and maybe I wouldn’t get the chance unless I took up the offer.  That perhaps I wanted a more personal connection so I said yes.

The role I was given as a Friends and Family Supervisor was more – much more – than I could possibly have hoped for.  Meeting, conversing, listening and becoming friends with not only family and friends of the warriors, but also befriending as many of the warriors as I did was – yes you guessed it – the most life changing thing I have done.  The emotions I felt for each and every single person at the Village is not describable. Every one of the 11 days I spent at the Village (including 2 days I was not booked on but showed up regardless) was filled with smiles, hugs, gratitude and love.  This was volunteering at its finest.  It wasn’t work.  I didn’t want to stay away.  I didn’t want it to end.  In my heart it is still ongoing.

So what has this done to me.  How has this changed me.  Again, I struggle to explain.  I learned to look at these athletes, these family members and see the person.  The heart and soul.  I realized what I saw on the outside and imagined what was ongoing on the inside, was not what defined them.  Their defining moment was out there on the field, in the pool, on the court, on the range, in the gym. The success that they achieved was not in winning – it was in competing. Conquering their demons and fears. And their families and friends were right there along with them.  Cheering them on, laughing with them, crying with them, succeeding with them.

Yes this was life changing for me. I want to go to Sydney.  I want to remain part of the Invictus family. I feel that this… this Invictus…these warriors… these families and friends are mine and my calling.  I have tried so hard with some success to explain to acquaintances and my own family what these games meant to me.  My experience. I can’t because I find I cannot incapsulate a feeling as large as this. This movement makes me proud to have been a part of it.  My family is proud of me for doing it and that is great to hear but it is more important to me that I may have made some small difference in the experience of each and every one of the 1900 plus participants at these Invictus games and that with luck I will continue to go on and make a difference.

Thank you Invictus 2017 for being the most life changing event in my life.

And this time I mean it.

I AM Invictus.

Debbie Gabura

Friends & Family Supervisor

Village

Invictus 2017

Adventures and musings of a Pan Am Volunteer

Pan Am - Toronto 2015 - what does that say to you?
Are you like the millions of other people who up until 18 days ago had no interest or even any idea what these games entail?
Were you one of the naysayers?  Poo Pooers?? Complaining about something you had a vague notion about or repeating what the media had to say right up until that first moment at the opening ceremonies?
And then... shazam.  What a ride.

I initially volunteered way back in June 2014.  And did my online interview in August.  And then waited...and waited...and waited...and wondered...and had just about given up when at Easter this year, while I was visiting my parents in NS and I got the email.  Role offered - Flag Co-Ordinator, Medals ceremony.  A quick look at the PDF link confused me as it stated Flag Bearer.  Me.  Somehow I thought it was probably meaning that I was actually going to be like ironing the flags, or repairing them. After all I am a seamstress.

Well I wasn't far off.  I actually was behind the scenes along with 2 or 3 other co-ordinators prepping the flags for the medal ceremony.  That entails steaming!!  Lol.

I'm not going to expand on what I actually did on prepping the flags.  I am going to share with you my overall experience and feelings about the 16 days I spent as a Pan Am Volunteer.  I do not think I can easily sum it all up.  But I will try.

I met so many wonderful people.  Everywhere I went if I was wearing my orange shirt or toting my backpack someone would strike up a conversation or high five me or ask me what I was going to be doing or what my role was.  Not once did I encounter any negativity from the general public.  I did my best to encourage them to check out a venue or watch on tv.  After all we were 23000 ambassadors for the games.

From my first encounter at the accredition site to walking into my venue for the first time all I felt was excitement. 

And love.  I loved every single minute of this.  I loved my venue - even with the humidity, sweating, shooting.  I loved my team.  The young ones, the silly ones, the supervisor, my other flag people.  We worked so well together.  We gelled.  I made (I hope) life long friends.  I didn't want to say goodbye.  We've made plans to get together before the end of August and I can't wait.  

From the first minute I arrived at the venue and was greeted with a smile and a welcome and sometimes a gift.  From the venue manager down to the people watching the gates everyone was happy, friendly and outgoing.  

I met volunteers from other countries who traveled here on their own dime, so they could take part in this amazing experience.  I also met many people who have done this very thing a few times - Vancouver Olympics, London Olympics, European Games, Canada Games.  How awesome must that be to travel and work at a games.  What experience they brought to our games.  And what awesome people they are to share their knowledge and expertise with the rest of us.  With smiles on their faces and love in their hearts.  Fred from Scotland, Colin from England.  Manwar from the middle east.  So many many more than that but those were some that I personally met and learned from.

Every where I went someone would say hello, someone would smile and say thank you.  Thank you for being a volunteer. What a great feeling.

I chatted with busdrivers from Quebec, athletes from Colombia, Peru, USA, Canada, Puerto Rico, Mexico, Argentina to name a few.  OPP officers from all over the area.  Even the police on duty had a smile and a quick word.

And the pins! First day at the venue our medals team were asking me about my pins on my lanyard.  They had never heard of trading.  I gave them their first pins and then they were off.  It gave them something to do during the hurry up and wait times.  Pin trading is a great icebreaker.  Complete strangers will stop you and ask to trade.  Athletes will offer you a pin.  I enjoyed watching the kids collections grow and the little rivalry that grew out of trading.  The meet and greet that Leah had organized before the opening ceremonies had a large amount of   trading.  So much fun.  Walking down the street people would admire the pins and ask about them.

The team.  I cannot believe that we had a unique team and experience but apparently that is what happened.  People heard about the Dream Team and came to visit to see for themselves.  I have never bonded so fast with such a large diversity of people as I did in those first 8 days.  Yes we were in a small venue and a small tent but I like to think that we just gelled.  We worked together cohesively.  No egos, no arguing, no prima donnas.  All for one.  One team, one dream.  I love these people. They are my family now.

The other volunteers.  Every single one brought something to these games and together we made these games a success.  People gave up work, family, vacation time to stand by a gate, to collect meal tickets, to wipe sweat off of a volleyball court, to check in other volunteers, to handle athletes, to drive here there and everywhere, to steam flags in 35C weather or stand out in pouring rain while handing out medals, to accredition, training, tech crew, media crew, setting up and taking down.  I personally didn't hear any complaining.  Just smiley faces.  And pleasant greetings.  Awesome.

I never wanted it to end.  I can say that this was the best experience of my life.  The ultimate highlight for me was seeing the flags and hearing the anthems of the gold medal athlete's country.  And hearing teammates sing out loud and proud.  My first ceremony I cried and my last ceremony I cried.  I had the privilege of carrying the bronze winner's flag in the last ceremony and to my great thrill it was the Canadian Flag. It didn't matter to me that it wasn't gold I was so thrilled to carry that flag out on my last shift.

The Canadian athletes who came back and thanked us for  being there. The USA gold medal winner who felt that our tent was a fun and relaxing place to hangout. On and off for days.  And meeting Pinball Clemons.  What an amazing role model/ambassador he is for the games and for our city.  He made me feel so special and he thanked me for doing this.

Every single 22999 volunteer who made this game a success with their sweat and hearts.  I thank you for being my friends, for accepting me as I am and for making this a once in a lifetime experience.  I hope that we can get to do this again sometime.  Maybe 2024???

Debbie
 

Lifes like that...How I started my summer

I see that it has been a few months since I last posted. I know I know, I promised pictures, maybe a recipe.  But life is busy.  And commitments get in the way.  And family.  And mindset.

So what has happened since May?  A lot of things.  This is a year of firsts for me.  Back in November I joined a ladies adult jazz class.  I had taken tap last year but had a dickens of a time with it.  So I was apprehensive about doing jazz.  However to my surprise (and the other ladies too I'm sure) I not only liked it I actually learned to dance!  We learned a dance to the popular "All about the Bass" and to say it was fun would be an understatement.  This particular studio is a client (and dear friend) of mine so I also had the pleasure of sewing the costumes for this group.  And that means I also did another first - I danced on the stage in their year end recital. Oh My God was that fun but scary!!  I was nervous leading up to the moment we stepped out on stage but once we started dancing I was fine!  So I messed up a little (maybe a lot) but it didn't matter I was having a great time and I have found a new group of friends who I can't wait to meet up with in September.

Thats me in the back on the left...

Another first?  I finally ran a real 5K.  I say finally cause I have been putting off committing to a race ever since way back when I discovered that maybe I could be a runner.  I had told Keith at the gym that I might actually do a race before the end of the year but I chickened out and didn't follow through. However, in early spring I saw a friend had joined the Bread Honey Race so I just did it.  Right then and there.  Paid, done.  And then I started training for it.  Right up to about 3 weeks before - which coincidentally was the night of the recital - I started to come down with a nasty cold.  It settled right in.  Sinus infection, coughing the whole nine yards.  I went ALL winter without a sniffle.  I couldn't run, I could barely walk across the room. BUT I had committed so morning of the race I got up and got my buns over to the course and I did it.  Not only did I do it - not a pretty sight mind you I walked quite a bit - but I beat my best time for me a 37:22.  I couldn't believe that I did that well.  And my hubby was there to record the moment I ran across the finish line.  Would I say I enjoyed it?  No.  However, I just may do it again.

A third first.  I conquered the stairs at the cottage where we run to and from.  Last year I managed the top half but refused to go any further down as there are spots that are quite scary for me (heights are not my friend).  This year I determined I would do those last flights.  And I did it. Freaked myself right out but...it is now easier for me.  I would not say I have gotten over my fear of heights but at least now I can say I did those 175 stairs down and 175 stairs up.

A fourth firtht oops first.  And this for me is the best one.  I volunteered at the Pan Am games (Toronto 2015).  I had the time of my life.  My role was flag co-ordinator for Medals and Flags ceremony.  Simply that means I, along with 2 or 3 other co-ordinators, prepped the flags for the medals ceremonies.  That involved more than you may think.  It also involved steaming.  In a small tent.  With at least 10 people inside.  In 30C plus humidity.  In rain.  In cold.  We had it all over the 8 days we were there.  Our venue was known as TTS - or Toronto Trap and Skeet.  That's right shooting.  Of which I know nothing.  But I didn't need to know a thing anyway.  Just the countries represented and who was qualifying for the finals and then who were the top 3.  After picking the flags, verifying them, steaming the folds and creases out we would then place them on the poles and hand the over to the ceremonial OPP team of the day.  I am simplifying the process but it was stressful at times, extremely humid and hot most days.  But not once did tempers flare.  We worked together as if we had been a team for years.  We became known as the Dream Team.  From the flag co-ordinators to the medal ceremony tray bearers and escorts, to the overall supervisor we became a cohesive team.  Otherwise also known as the Amoeba.

I'd like to share a bit of that experience with you.  I think I will start a new blog post - like right now..go look.

Debbie

3C Soup

I've been asked to share recipes I have found along this journey and I have obliged and added a few to my blog in the past year.  Most recipes are for dinner and many are carb free.  They are also good for company meals.  We eat fish (mostly salmon), pork, beef and a lot of chicken.  I employ a slow cooker, a pressure cooker, a gas stove and a gas bbq.  Many meals are quick and all are made with fresh ingredients.  Very rarely do I utilize anything canned and only low sodium products are used.  I use honey or maple syrup for sweetener as well as organic coconut palm sugar.  I have a variety of different vinegar's (balsamic, white balsamic, white wine, red wine, cider, rice and good ol white) as well as a few oils (olive, walnut, coconut). I still use butter but sparingly - most recipes you can substitute coconut oil it doesn't impart any flavour at all that we have noticed.  I have also substituted whole grain flour in recipes and while it does give a bit nuttier flavour or firmer complexion to the dish it is not much different in taste.  My advice is to experiment.  If you have the better ingredients on hand substitute.  I make all my own dressings fresh.  I use a very small mini food processor for that purpose and it works amazing.  Rule of thumb is if you make it then you know exactly what is in it!  The mantra is - no processed, no white, no artificial, no chemicals.  All fresh!

Here is the 3C Soup - Curried Peanut Chicken Coconut Soup with Roasted Tomatoes!

I like to google recipes and save them to pinterest.  I had part of a rotisserie chicken and thought hmmm what could I use that for - bingo.  I found one good size bowl very filling and I had enough left over for 2 lunches.  Makes 4 good servings.

3 C SOUP

1 small can organic unsweetened coconut milk (found in the ethnic aisle)
3 or 4 plum tomatoes or 1/2  large can low sodium tomatoes or 1 small can fire roasted tomatoes
fresh rotisserie chicken - 2 cups shredded (I used only the white meat)
2 tbsp curry paste - apparently it comes in red, yellow and green - I bought the red
2 Cups chicken broth - low sodium or home made
3/4 cup natural peanut butter
kosher/sea salt
roasted peanuts for garnish and a lime wedge if desired.

1) Roast tomatoes under the broiler for 5 minutes or until they start to blacken - you can buy canned roasted tomatoes but I am unsure if there is a low sodium variety
2) while they are roasting, in a large saucepan heat the chicken broth and whisk in the curry paste, bring to a boil
3) add the peanut butter and coconut milk while stirring constantly simmer for 2 or 3 minutes on medium high
4) add chopped or diced tomatoes and the shredded chicken add some kosher salt to taste (I use a pinch or two)
5) heat thoroughly - maybe 5 mins - but do not boil, stirring occasionally
6) serve in a bowl with chopped roasted peanuts and a lime wedge as garnish!

Enjoy!

YES I am STILL here 365 Days Later - Happy 1 yr Anniversary!

I suppose you've been wondering where I am?

What am I doing?

Am I OK?

Did I fall off the path?

Well no, I haven't fallen off the path.  There were moments of straying pass the line.  Periods of time where life, the real deal, rears its ugly head and says it's still there.  

Real life...

Death of a dear father-in-law

Passing of a devoted pet

Christmas & New Years celebrations

Work overload 

Weather (ugh) 

Family visit home to NS

So how did I deal with all that?

First I continued to eat clean and healthy as much as I possibly could.  Which means at least 80% of the time I had my smoothies, ate good salads with protein for lunch and lean dinners with little to no carbs.  80% of the time... the other 20% was those times when I ate what I wanted to.  Sandwiches at a funeral, comfort food.  Munchies and dinners at friends at New Years, sharing food.  Work I stocked my fridge and ate cleanly but occasionally as opposed to daily I had a take out lunch - Burger King or local deli or pizza or Swiss Chalet.  Weather also played into that. Family visit home?  Home food, Easter dinner, special request comfort food (cod cakes :) ), fried clams.  And through all those some wine...and maybe a martini or two.  

Secondly I went to the gym as often as I felt I could - I know it still should have been a priority but first if you are away - its difficult to find a gym or time to go.  Also I can't ask my staff to forego their outside activities and not give up mine - so working 8 or 9 am to 10 pm or later is on all of us.  Then there were other activities at least over New Years we skated pretty much every day and hiked through the snow just to visit friends.  I also joined an adult jazz class the end of November but also missed 4 weeks in a row as my dear friend gave up her time to come down and sew crazily with me on her day off - same day as my jazz class - so I didn't attend.  Basically 4 straight weeks of no exercise at all.

Did it matter?  Yes it friggen did!  Not only did I really miss it, and the people at the gym, but the scale was not friendly to me.  I went up and down.  Overall more down then up.  I still lost weight and PBF but there were times when the scale went up as much as 5 or 6 lbs. Did I freak out?  Yes I did a little, but then for the next 7 or so days I went wholeheartedly back to clean eating and it came back off. Took some time but it did.  

And the outcome is that even with all that real life going on, eating clean 80% of the time still helps.  That is MY real life now.  My living life this way.  Lifestyle CHANGE.  And never ever slipping back into that cycle that spirals out of control and you end up looking like I did one year ago today.  The day I took control of that cycle and changed MY LIFE. 

April 29, 2014 an innocuous day.  No special meaning to that day before but now it is a special day.  An anniversary day of sorts.  The first day of the rest - yes the REST of my life. Not going backwards again - just forwards.

I have attained so much - did so many firsts - set goals and met them. Some took a bit longer than others but ultimately who cares - I met them.  

What have I accomplished?  Don't laugh these are big to me....

a) joined a gym - first obstacle overcome

b) learned about nutrition and eating clean - for life

c) joined the Weight Loss Team - awesome people, awesome motivation do not think I could have done it without them I mean that!

d) learned how to run and learned I kinda like it

e) lifted weights - yah me - and I kinda like that too

f) overcome some of my fears regarding those stairs at the Cunliffes

g) lost weight, inches, percent body fat 

h) became vocal and tried to inspire others to eat clean and get healthier

i) joined a jazz class

j) took a fitness/wellness/MMA class

k) conquered some yoga moves that a year ago I just looked at others and thought you are too bendy for me!!

l) volunteered for the upcoming PanAm Games here in Toronto

m) signed up for my first outside 5k race!  A goal I joked about with Keith back after my first actual run on a treadmill back in May 2014.

n) Hit my goal of weight loss of 40 - 45 lbs and actually hit 52 lbs!

o) Cut my PBF in half!  From 47.8% to 24.6% as of yesterday morning.  Half HALF!!!

Here they are folks - numbers from April 29 2014 - April 29 2015

Start               Jul 29  Sept 18     Oct 17           Nov 18        April 29/15  

Wht -190         162     155           152.2           146.5             138.2

BF% -47.8      33.4      ?              30.23%     29.4                  24.6

W -40.5"         32         32             31               30                    30

B -44"             39         38             38               37                    37

H -46"             39         38             38               37                    37

Arm -15"         11         11             12               12                    11

C -18"            15.5       15.5          15               15                    15

Th -26"          20.75      20.5          20.25         19                     19.5

Size - XL/18                                                                            S/XS/8

Overall losses - weight - 51.8 lbs

BF - 23.2%

W - 9.5"

B - 7"

H - 9"

Arm - 4"

C - 3"

Th - 6.5"

Total inches - 34" loss overall

Down 5 sizes 5 whole sizes

I find it interesting that my measurements haven't changed all that much since November but I am wearing a smaller size and have lost more weight. For example:

I have even lost weight in my feet!!  Shoes that were snug are now a bit loose even though I still wear a size 7 I think I had started to buy some of my shoes in a 7.5.  
I can wear normal calf size boots - something I haven't been able to do since high school. 
My wrists are smaller, the tale of the wristwatch that needs to be tightened.  My gear fit when I purchased it I wore it on the 6th hole now its on the 4th but could be on the 3rd if I want it to be snug.
My belts are too big and the size 10 pants I was wearing in the fall are too big in the waist and butt, so now I'm wearing an 8 but even that is loose.  

What have I learned over this past year?

a) losing weight and heading towards fitness is hard work but not as hard as I thought it would be

b) any age, any time is a good time to start

c) you don't know what you can do until you try - the key is to try

d) support is everywhere - at the gym, at home, family, friends, even people you pass in the gym or have done business with they are all supportive and in your corner and the ones who aren't?  Not true friends that is for sure.

e) getting over mindset is the biggest obstacle

f) no one can fix you or give you an easy out, only you can fix you and push yourself

g) laziness and tiredness is a state of mind - our bodies can still do stuff and by pushing through the tiredness you are stronger for it

h) we are never too old to learn a new dance step or overcome a fear or learn new things about ourselves

i) the scale is not the definitive answer to health - inches and bodyfat percentage tell the tale.

j) eating healthy isn't difficult once your learn how and you won't (or shouldn't) be hungry - snacking is important!  Experimenting with recipes is fun and eye opening.

k) and I never ever want to go back to 190 lbs of unfitness!

This journey has indeed been such a journey. Like any other there have been bumps, hills and valleys. But always in the same direction.  I have also learned that this journey is ongoing and neverending.  That there will always be something else to focus on or set as a goal. 

Life is for living and enjoying and I intend to do just that.  

I promised a recipe but this blog is long enough.  Tomorrow - picture update and the recipe for a 4C soup.

Talk tomorrow,

Debbie

TEAM Weight Loss - THANKYOU

I have many many things to say about this being my last TEAM Weight Loss Class.  I dont even know where to begin.

Let's start with a picture - before and after.

I have so many things going on today - tomorrow being the celebration of my father in laws life - I can't begin to sit and write out a blog post.  I just wanted to post this picture to mark this day.

April 29 was the first day of my journey - November 21 is the first day of the rest of my fitter life!!

I'll be back next week.
Debbie